YOU-others, handed me labels and handles, definitions of Who I Am. Somehow, I have spent a lifetime constantly redefining myself using your words.
I'm oversensitive? Oh... okay. I guess I am then.
I'm opinionated? um, if you say so.
strong-willed? ... really? are you sure?
unafraid? ... have you been watching?
granola? ....it's a cereal. Yes, I like it.
nature girl? ... I do love nature. I also love shopping.
negative? ... about negative things...yes.
hateful? ... I don't hide it well, eh?
The list goes on, depending on who is offering up their opinion that day of that facet of me.
But, wait... AM I who they see? Who they say I am? Do I believe in those labels?
We decide about people, but what about asking them first, "How do you see yourself? Is the
mirror-self the same as the others-self?
Do I have to fit myself, my entire self, into one of those or all of those descriptions simply because someone or someones have indicated that is what they see in me? What if those labels are not at all what I see of myself? What if those labels are only a little bit of me, and there are other parts that are quite opposite of the labels? If I admit to being a Nature Girl/Granola type, does that mean I can't buy something that comes in a plastic container or throw away something that should have been recycled once in a while? Does it mean my clothes have to be earthy, organic, and shapeless? Can't I still wear high heels, lacy undies, and sequins sometimes? And if I admit to being negative, can I also be positive and optimistic, believing in fairies and teaching kids to be thankful and look on the bright side?
I don't like being defined. Instead of, "You're so -----------", how about, "I like you the way you are." or "How do you see yourself right now?" Or the old favorite, if you don't have anything NICE to say...
Or maybe it's me. Insecure enough to LET, to allow, the labels to stick, rather than shaking them off. I don't have to prove which ones apply. I don't have to wear them all at once, or at all, if I don't want to....